What you are looking at are the season’s first sprouts of the fanciest and crispest fancy lettuce mix, the evening before they were set outside to soak up some sun.
Did you know that, if left outside to soak up some sun, fancy lettuce tends to disappear, all in one day, replaced only with dirt, and with a series of squirrel-sized tracks traversing the pot?
Did you know that vegetarians can still blast squirrels without a challenge to their sense of ethical rectitude, especially lettuce-thieving squirrels, and make a nice squirrel-skinned cap out of them, or at least a pair of earmuffs? Â It’s part of the Vermin Exception.
(Okay, I’m not so sure about this last bit. Â But this will not stop me from doing my worst with the culprit, and should he or she be literate and following this blogh, this should be considered a sobering warning. Â You’ve enjoyed your last of my greens.)
Time to replace/reinforce the cover on the cold frame.
I think I read about the Vermin Exception in the bible. Or maybe it was in a romance novel…. either way, I’m pretty sure you’re right about that.
Even vegans are allowed to shoot squirrels.
There’s no such thing as one squirrel, btw. You could end up with enough fur to do the bye-baby-bunting thing…
Gayle, I fully expect Our Girl to be able to catch squirrels with her bare hands and have her way with them. By the time she’s a year old. Hopefully that’ll take care of the problem.
Penny, from ehat you’ve read, does the Vermin Exception apply to qualifying people as well?
I’ve met hippy farmers who say the only way to get rid of a woodchuck is with a shotgun. Squirrels are obvious culprits, but everyone out there loves micro greens, not just the 1%. Cut worms, slugs, chipmunks and rabbits devour them with the same avidity as Mitt Romney.Romney’s hair would make an excellent seat warmer, if you can get the hairspray off.
We don’t waste shotshells on woodchucks around here. The dog is a certified woodchuck exterminator. She kills them the way an orca kills seals- shakes them back and forth in her jaws, then hurls them as high as she can in the air, with a crazed gleam in her eye.